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Katherine at Healing You
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Parenting


When we heal ourselves we give an extraordinary gift to our children and grandchildren,
not to mention, the extraordinary life we can create for ourselves and those we share it with love.

Christina Rose, Australian Bush Flower Essence Lecturer

Elliot Cowan in his poetic book Plant Spirit Medicine (for further information: Resources) provides a way of contemplating the roles of Mother and Father.  You might like to reflect on what is below regarding your role in your children’s life and the roles of your parents in your life. 

Mother

Mothering is about home, security, nurturing, care and empathy.  When we can’t let go, hoard, or have habits and addictions that upset our balance our Mother element is affected.

Our Mother teaches us by her example.  She understands us; this shows us how to understand others (empathy). She feeds us; we learn to feel secure and open handed (generosity). She never abandons us, we learn loyalty. She never has forgotten us, we learn how to remember (we are all one; we are spiritual beings in a physical body).

A mother’s breasts give nourishment, security, identity and fulfillment.  Our mouths connect our stomachs to our Mother and Mother Earth.  Our stomachs have minds.  A well fed stomach brings contentment and eliminates envy, greed and competitiveness.  Contentment brings gratitude and the ability to sympathise.  We understand and know we are all one – nothing separates or divides us.

What are you feeding yourself physically and mentally? Everyone can stomach a certain amount of stress and violence in their diet providing they don’t overindulge.  A healthy stomach can churn it, mix it and rot it down into a digestible form. Our stomachs give us the ability to turn an idea or experience over in our minds – we ponder.

If the stomach is weak even bland food can be indigestible.  Innocuous experiences are churned over and over in a vain effort to break them down and assimilate them; this is worry, and eventually, obsession.

The spirit has a stomach that needs to be fed regularly and well.  A hungry spirit feels deprived and insecure. It may make an elaborate show of giving to others but comes from a base of nothing. A starving spirit eventually gives up the struggle and resigns itself to slow, wasting death.

When our connection to Mother is severed our soul has been violated with neglect and knows the depths of grief.  The pain can be so deep it can remove the will to live. 

So we look for something to fill the hollow place in our heart.

Mothers have to be strong. Within the body, the work of mothering is done by the spleen and pancreas. Their function is dynamic and muscular and enables us to have those qualities. They bring sugar to every cell (and sweetness to our lives).  If life tastes bitter or metallic it is because our spleen/pancreas is too ill to work. We will crave sugar when we don’t know the sweetness of being supported by Mother Earth.

We seek our Mother’s presence in Mother Earth. When we stray from Mother Earth we become weak and emaciated.  Allow her body to press against the soles of your feet and you will know who you are and where you stand.

Mother Earth can heal us.  She still loves us and is full of sympathy and understanding. We just need to ask. Mother Earth represents the physical, emotional and spiritual nourishment and support we all need.  Go outside and sit on the ground and ask Mother Earth to give you the support and nourishment you need in your life today. Tell this great Nurturer and Stabilizer what you need and then receive it by feeling your body relax, and your heart and mind grow calm. Be close to the one who feeds your flesh, your mind and your soul: Mother Earth.

Father

To know who we are, we need our Father.  Our Father is our first love: he acknowledges, appreciates and accepts us in those early days of our lives. If this doesn’t happen, our souls become injured and the hole in our heart is in the shape of the Father.

The Father is the one who shows us the way through the world; through him, we come to know what is of value in life. His hand on our shoulder gives us the feeling of dignity and self worth. He is the first and greatest authority in our lives: because he respects us, we respect ourselves; because we respect ourselves, we respect others.  All forms of authority are forms of fathering.

A Father’s role is to recognise our essence, to encourage and instruct us so that it may come forth and bless our life with its unique quality.  Our life is then rich; every mundane experience is important and charged with significance, our connection to spirit is strong.

When our Father does not provide this, we have suffered a great loss; our soul has been violated with neglect and knows the depths of grief.  The pain can be so deep it can remove the will to live.

So we look for something to fill the hollow place in our heart.

We seek the presence of our Father in Heaven.  He is the source of spiritual wealth.  If we can’t find him we look for substitutes – material wealth and/or wealth of information, facts or learning. The lack of inspiration from Heaven makes us weaker, resulting in chronic issues: lung, colon, pain and/or exhaustion.

Spiritual wealth is found through the direct act of generosity of sharing from one soul to another.  It is not found in the collecting of power, accolades, knowledge or material wealth.  There is nothing special that needs to be accomplished in order to come into His presence.  All you have to do is breathe.

The Heavenly Father pervades the air around us and enters us through our lungs with every breath. The essence of the Father is metal: gold, silver and platinum. 

Authority and power are at the core of the masculine principle in men and women. Grief takes the cutting edge off strength and tempers it with kindness.  When we have grieved we have been softened and made kind, we are more authentic, more powerful and ultimately more authoritative.

We need to let go and feel grief - not block it, thinking we have to be ‘strong’.  This is not strength but a resounding no to letting go. Grief sets our values straight.  It teaches respect. If grief has been deeply felt, one is clear about what is important and how precious human life is.

Before the essence of the Father can inspire us through our lungs, we must be remove the blocks inside us. Our colon  removes the waste and brings an openness to our body, mind and spirit.  

The energy of the Father, in all forms of life, can wound us, challenge us or anger us.  This leads us to sharpen our lives, brings authority and guidance, or gives us riches which are then mixed together to give us the gains and losses of our lives.

Where in you is the hidden ‘metallic’ steel like strengths that you need to grow and expand? Go outdoors and breathe deeply.  Breath is the source of power that connects us to the Father. Ask this metallic, heavenly power to strengthen and firm your life, to heal loss, welcome opportunity and gain new capability to act and live in the world.

Respect the one who breathes life into your body, mind and spirit: your Heavenly Father.

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